What makes a man after a divorce?
Indeed, in five-year-old age, they are separated from the mother, going to «Male subculture», In addition, immediately after the divorce, they do not have a pronounced depression, nor obsessive states, they do not remember a happy family life, do not feel guilty and are not afraid of the future. According to the statistics of psychologists, 65% of men are married for five years after the divorce, however, they consider the first marriage of the best, 15% are married from five to ten years, and 20% find a permanent pair or create a new family only after 20 years or more, and sometimes remain alone.
However, in the past ten years, psychologists, psychotherapists and sexologists pay more attention to what men do after a divorce. The reason is that about 30% of men become their customers, while in half cases they lead to them former wives. Often divorced men are depressed and confused, abuse alcohol or overeat, they have an interest in work and sexual activity, premature ejaculation and other sexual disorders appear. The development of these syndromes arising after a year and a half after the divorce (or «seventeenth month») Explains disappointment. The fact is that a man after a divorce represents that «on the will» He will meet an ideal woman – Beautiful, sexy, kind, caring and more. However, the holiday is not feasible – Often he faces criticism, insufficient care and even sexual infidelity girlfriends. As a result, he soberly appreciates women, but it leads to depression.
In a new way he assesses the previous family life, remembering the most pleasant moments. At this time, most men want to return to the family, but the harsh laws of the male community impede this. During this period, they understand that there is not everyone to live alone. Many of them mastering a lot of destructive impulses, with whom in family life helps to handle wives: the desire to drink or eat over the measure, more entertained and have sex. On «Will» no one hinders this, but the responsibility for the family is inferior to the place of responsibility for itself. No one supports him in a difficult moment, he does not advise him and does not tell him. Yes, and during frequent sexual ties with partners or familiar, much more psychological and physiological energy is spent. Indeed, unlike his wife, to the body of which a man has already been adjusted, a new partner requires long caress, longer and energetic sex.
And to adjust under it, it is necessary not less than five-seven meetings with at least a small emotional attachment, you need to continue to communicate with it, sometimes to take home, carefully follow its condition. Therefore, psychotherapists who found out what makes a man after a divorce, they advise former beans not to despair, and do not assume that the husband’s decision is finally and irrevocable. Of course, it is not necessary to arrange scandals, run behind him and begging back. It is much better to maintain the former friendships, holding the door open until the man matures to continue the relationship. According to statistical data in large Russian cities, each third man would like to return to the old wife, and every fourth comes back to it. The mistress of a divorced man also need to suffer and not be surprised that he, although he is good with her, is limited to two and three meetings per week, while not in a hurry to create a family.
It should be remembered that he left his wife not to build a joint life on the other. He needs freedom, including in sex, so it is not necessary to rush it, so that the relationship did not collapse. In general, a woman should not be mistaken in the fact that a man after a five-seven or ten-year-old worker thinks only about a suitable new wife. On the contrary, after the divorce, he will be able to adapt to «Long-term bachelor life». Therefore, women should not spend a lifetime on waiting, repulse from themselves other potential grooms.
Divorced man is usually one and a half – two years old meet with several women. But the woman he is not disseminated, you need to take it as tributary and accept. Psychotherapists call two opposite positions occupied by women when communicating with men after a divorce: on the one hand – hyperemp and domestic and gastronomic service, bordering the enclosure; with another – indifference and laying of excessive caring to more serious relationships. Both behaviors are useless. Just a woman wishing to like, you need to show yourself from the best side and in everyday life, and in sex, but not overdo it.